E is for Embarrassment
Hmm, embarrassment. Totally not sexy, right? Come on it’s okay to admit it does nothing for you. It’s my job to try to explain how embarrassment might be hot, so I accept the challenge:)
The concept of embarrassment as a turn-on in itself is one that’s not often spoken of explicitly; it’s sort of “understood” among many of us who’re kinky. Embarrassment is the “less extreme” sibling of humiliation, which is often thought of as a kink in and of itself. I think of embarrassment as the spice or enhancement (see, another E word!) for the main course, whereas Humiliation itself could be the main course (or in this case, the point of whatever the hell we’re doing).Like so many other kinks there is a fine line between the good embarrassment and the bad. Alas, this is a subjective thing, which can make things a little fraught for authors seeking to explore it.
One of the simplest — and in my opinion — one of the sweetest forms of embarrassment, is playing on the sub’s innate bashfulness regarding her body. Perhaps she blushes prettily as she’s ordered to display her charms for her Dom. What she may not realize is that her Dom savors her embarrassment — but not for the reasons she might think. Though he knows she has NOTHING to be embarrassed about — he finds her hot as hell — he lets her go right on being embarrassed. Her Dom thinks she’s gorgeous, but finds her embarrassment at displaying herself equal parts adorable and arousing. Does her own embarrassment mask her own arousal at her “forced” exhibition of her body? Somehow her embarrassment adds that certain je ne sais quoi that makes this something so much more than simply baring a woman’s body. It’s confusing, and wonderful, and mysterious all at once:)
Fortunately, for those of us who write kink and want to explore the allure of embarrassment, there is that one act, that pillar of kink that almost everyone understands — and that almost everyone has personally experienced.
And that would be spanking.
Spanking — whether the good girl kind or the bad girl kind (I heart giving both — I know, not relevant) — is a LOT more than just a hot, stinging bottom. Or at least it should be:)
It’s the ritual of the thing that adds so much more to the comparatively straight forward physical act. Spanking can (and should, if it’s up to me) include elements of forced exhibitionism. The spanker gets to enjoy the sight of her naked body both before and after her punishment. Perhaps she stands in the corner, her soft, round bottom on display as she contemplates the punishment to come (see Anticipation), or instead, she’s led to the corner, still weeping, to be made to exhibit the painful results of her wayward ways for the next 30 minutes.
The husband ordering his wayward wife to lower her panties for her impending punishment, ordering her to turn her bottom toward him as she does so, and making sure she bends at the waist. Embarrassment.
Commenting on the color of her cheeks as you spank her, noting aloud the tell tale sheen of moisture glinting between blatantly exposed pussy lips. Double embarrassment.
Growling at your woman to keep her ass loose while she’s punished, since you like to watch the wobble of her buttocks as your smack them. High Octane embarrassment.
Spanking is more than physical pain — it’s physical pain + submission + embarrassment. The whole becomes much greater than the sum of its parts, but I would argue the embarrassment factor is just as important to a spanking as the ass smacking itself. Or maybe that’s just me:)
Rather than go on and on for thousands of words, I’ll take mercy on you kind souls and end this here. I hope you’ll take some time to visit the other stops on this month-long blog challenge. Happy reading!